Friday, September 29, 2006

Rock those wrinkles

…HA always wants to tell Nora Ephron that we have something in common. A guy. But that’s the stuff of another blog (and we know HA is always very discreet).

…Moving on, Nora wrote a book about her neck “contours” called I Feel Bad About My Neck.

…Nora looked in the mirror and thought, “Hello. Ohmygod, what is that looking at me in the mirror?”

…The face lies, she quips--the neck never.

…HA must stop this right here. Nora is 65, she says. And does not look it! There, HA said it—and the guy married her. Wait, did HA mention that again?

…Life is confusing when you get older, Nora claims. You are wiser—but how can you be, because you have forgotten so much.

…Nora figures she spends eight hours a week, including exercise, to maintain her looks. She has twice-weekly hair appointments, waxing, manicures, and hair dyeing (why 60 looks like 40, by the way).

...She did say in an interview that facials are a waste of time--buy a moisturizer.

…The money quote: “It’s totally comical the amount of time it takes just to basically attempt to stand still and not be an eyesore.”

…(Eyesores take even more time to cover up.)

…She sort of thinks (like she is trying out the thought) that you should live everyday like your last. Eat two desserts.

…Maybe she is trying to fill in those wrinkles the HA Way(tm)—with fat.

…Remember, they don’t even have one dessert in Darfur. Save a little time each day for it not to be about you.

…HA is just sayin'.

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