Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Four-letter word


…People who know HA know she is a rape survivor. Even people who don’t know her personally know that—she wrote a bylined story in the Washington Post in 1981 to motivate the police to search harder for her attackers (never caught).

…HA knows she did nothing wrong and that these criminals should be the ones doing the cowering and hiding out, but she understands how talking about sexual violence is difficult and gives people what they think is sexual information about you, which can make them—and you—uncomfortable.

...Does it make you cringe a little reading this about HA? See? That is what she is talking about. Maybe it's a TMI thing.

…Writing about this in the East Valley Trib (May 5, 2008), Sam Miller of the Freedom News Service talks about some websites women (and some men) now use to write about their experiences anonymously and presumably banish some of the horror and immediacy.

…The FBI says one in three women will be raped in their lifetime. Yet, for a range of reasons, not the least of which is the ickiness factor, people don’t want to talk about it.

…Even 27 years later, the experience still drifts back to HA a few times a day.

…As the experts like to say, you never get rid of it. But you can maybe defuse it by talking about it.

…One site people use is www.pointswithpurpose.com (selling something, not sure what). Others are www.survivingtothriving.org and www.aftersilence.org. HA thought the last one looked the most inviting.

…But even now, HA thought: Don’t write about this.

….But as most people know, HA does not take direction well.

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